You’re very kind.
The death of the novelization (though a pulse is sometimes found), is a strange one. DVD might be to blame - but why wasn’t the same true for video? Video was just as big in the '90s, yet so were the novelizations of those same films. Notably, I think, the ones you find now tend to be based on sci-fi or superhero films, which suggests fans of those properties, who are typically enthusiastic and inquisitive about the “world” in which they are set, are more likely to delve deeper into the stories by reading the book. Conversely, fans of, say, Fast and the Furious are less likely to do that, while such kinetic action scenes wouldn’t be as satisfying when rendered in prose.
As for TV tie-ins, that too is a curio. You would think, with twenty four episodes a year, fans of these shows would have their fill just by watching it (not knocking such fans at all - I’m one of them!). Most tie-ins are based on detective shows like Murder, She Wrote and Monk, and that genre lends itself to the novel anyway as that’s where it started out (a House novel, by contrast, would be very difficult to pitch, though I’ll admit this doesn’t explain why 24 and Burn Notice got books too). I’d imagine most publishers prefer tie-ins with original stories as they are offering something new and therefore more tantalizing to the consumer.
Funnily enough, these things have been around at least since the '60s, with Man from U.N.C.L.E. (even Girl from U.N.C.L.E. and The Avengers, and even The Monkees getting original novels (which meant, of course, they couldn’t play their own instruments here either, because books don’t have sound!).
Anyway, please forgive my rambling
P.S.
That’s a funny Bill Hicks routine. Haven’t seen much of him before. Recall reading how his work was ripped off by Denis Leary (so amazing, honestly, in Thomas Crown Affair, that I checked out more of his films on the back of it), who used stand-up as a way of getting into acting).