Movies: Presumably 2026, maybe Beyond

The first Scary Movie came out in 2000, which is old enough for it to be nostalgic. They’ve also returned control of the franchise to the original creators, which is nice after taking it away from them with Scary Movie 3.

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They’ve been talking about this show for what feels like close to a decade now. I’ll believe it when I actually see it.

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Backrooms falls off 70% in its second weekend, but that’s still good for around $25 million or so, making it A24’s highest grossing film in all metrics now after only 8 days of release.

Can’t say that I’m even remotely surprised that Masters of the Universe fell competely flat. I mean, who couldn’t have seen that coming?

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At some point they’ll get Jared Leto is box office poison.

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I’m astonished this vehicle made it to a theatrical release at all. What’s the supposed target audience for this, us geezers approaching the big six? Gen Z or the TikTokers? How did this get a budget, when there’s hardly anybody left remembering it positively? Difficult to imagine there’s a sizeable fanbase for, of all things, Masters of the Universe…

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I don’t understand why.

I suspect it’s high drama to work with him but he is a fascinating actor nevertheless.

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Maybe because it was stuck so long in development hell? Or maybe it’s the natural culmination of the nostalgia cycle?

Nostalgia seems to come in 30-year cycles.

The 80’s famously had the wave of 50’s nostalgia.

In the 90’s, one of the big trends in movies was adaptations of 60’s TV shows (Fugitive, Mission: Impossible, etc.)

Admittedly, 70’s nostalgia in the 2000’s was a bit more muted.

And then we got onto the 80’s nostalgia of the 2010’s, which feels like it never quite ended. Maybe it’s that generation’s hold over popular media? Or maybe the film industry’s increasing aversion to risk, exacerbated by the pandemic shutdowns, means that it’s now harder than ever to move forward.

This decade’s expected wave of 90’s nostalgia feels like it never arrived. Another reason for this is that one of the biggest properties of the 90’s, The Simpsons, never went away and is still putting out new episodes. It’s not the only one, as plenty of other popular ’90s pop culture never actually went away long enough to be nostalgic.

With the new Scary Movie becoming a hit, I’ve seen some people speculate that the 2000s nostalgia wave is here, making it feel like we more or less bypassed 90s nostalgia. I have mixed feelings about this, since on the one hand I’m sick of the increasingly nostalgia-driven media landscape, but at the same time I’ve also been deprived of my generation’s nostalgia!

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Agreed. And it’s a shame since the 90s are the last decade for which any kind of nostalgia is even really all that appropriate anyway. The new millennium has been an absolute horror show for pretty much its entire 26 years so far. I have no idea what we could possibly be nostalgic about from the 2000s onward, but, then again, maybe others can get more mileage out of that than I can.

With regards to Masters of the Universe, I thought this was a somewhat interesting read:

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Could not be more excited. Shame Eisenberg passed, there’s one line in particular in this that would have landed a bit harder if he hadn’t. All the same, this looks great.

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Audiences have no interest in legendary movie making skills which easily tower over anyone else‘s in the current marketplace. And despite a massive marketing tour…

We don’t deserve great movies, we‘re content with one trick horror and Super Mario „films“.

Oh, there is another cloud coming up…

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Hey, better than expected. There is still hope for contemporary audiences!

… although the guy in the comment sections claiming Scary Movie 5 had a much higher „entertainment factor“ already makes me cry into my pillow.

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Parodying what?

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I’d love for there to be another Austin Powers film, but I’d be shocked if this ended up happening. There seems to be a little bit of buzz about one whenever Myers appears as one of the characters, like he did for Saturday Night Live several years ago, but it obviously hasn’t happened.

It would be interesting to see if they could work in a joke about the Bond franchise using the Goldmember gag where Bond and Blofeld are actually long lost brothers.

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But is it still a joke when everybody is already in on it? Isn’t that even the core reason there’s not been another Austin Powers entry; simply because reality overtook the franchise from the far end and now there’s not a lot left to make fun of for that particular satire? Everything has already seen its umpteenth gag thrown at the audience and his majesty 007 himself took ‘inspiration’ from it. Can’t get any better, can it?

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I think there’s more that could be said with Austinn Powers, and I have been down a bit of a mental rabbit hole about where to go next.

Austin Powers’s Dark and Gritty Reboot?

Austin Power’s Unnecessary Origin Story?

But my favourite idea was Austin Powers Code Name Theory.

Basically, a feature-length joke about how ridiculous the idea of James Bond as a code name is, while also providing some meta commentary on the obsession with reboots and actors stepping into iconic roles.

I even planned out an opening gag that would feature Idris Elba as Austin…

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You could also have Tom Cruise reprising his role as Austin Powers. This long awaited “reboot” could be brought to the viewing public by none other than Les Grossman.

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I’m not interested in another Austin Powers movie. We don’t need legacy sequels for every single franchise years after the fact. It’s like The Matrix. I was on board for Resurrections but walked out wishing it didn’t happen. Some things are of their time and it’s been so long it’s better to just leave it be. Making another just wouldn’t be the same. The moment has been and gone.

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