This week’s James Bond ranking subject comes to us via Twingolot. I originally hadn’t thought of this being a ranking subject, but his suggestion seemed like a good one and there are lots of options to choose from.
So, what is a close shave / great escape? (Sorry, I couldn’t decide which description I liked better so I used both. 
) I consider it to be a situation (i.e. trap) where the henchmen or villains put Bond in that he can’t–or at least shouldn’t–escape from, and yet, of course, he does. As a result, situations that occur from or during fights are heavily discouraged unless that film doesn’t really have a true trap-like situation.
Again, Never Say Never Again is eligible and only one situation / trap per film.
So how do you rank the James Bond close shaves / great escapes?
My list is:
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Crocodile Island – LIVE AND LET DIE – Perhaps the most seemingly impossible trap on this list. So impossible, that even Bond’s gadget can’t save him. But 007 uses his quick thinking and simply walks across the crocodiles’ backs to safety. Ingenious! Big kudos to crocodile farm owner Ross Kananga for being willing, setting up the animals, AND performing the stunt so well.
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Laser Beam – GOLDFINGER – Bond finds himself in a most delicate and pressing situation as he’s strapped to a table with a gold-cutting laser beam inexorably inching towards his groin. There is no escape. Gadget-less and with time running out, Bond manages to literally talk himself out of his situation. Very cleverly done.
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The Orient Express – FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE – Now this situation includes a fight, but Bond’s predicament has been leading up to this moment throughout the film so it is included here. Bond finds himself on the wrong end of a gun, helpless, and yet, one again, manages to talk himself into having a chance at escape by tricking Donald “Red” Grant into opening his tear gas-armed briefcase. What ensues is the best fight in the series.
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Keelhauling – FOR YOUR EYES ONLY – Taken from the Live And Let Die novel, a grisly fate awaits Bond and Melina Havelock as they get tied up and keelhauled over razor-sharp coral to entice nearby sharks for an easy meal. Despite their situation, Bond manages to cut himself free on the coral and then through strength and smarts snap the line tugging them through the water. A previously well-placed air tank ensures their escape.
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Surrounded – NO TIME TO DIE – Chased by SPECTRE thugs, Bond and Madeleine Swann find themselves surrounded on all sides and continuously fired upon by Primo. Bond just sits there doing nothing, contemplating the end, when Madeleine’s frantic pleas rouse him to action. Suddenly, Bond and the incomparable Aston Martin DB5 jump to life. He immediately smokes the car’s tires by performing donuts and firing his Gatling machine guns. As the bad guys dive for cover, Bond and Madeleine make their escape.
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Conveyor Belt – LICENCE TO KILL – Unceremoniously dropped on a conveyor belt, Bond soon finds himself hanging by his fingertips over a cocaine grinder and Dario looming over him, switchblade in hand. Along comes Pam Bouvier to distract the henchman, giving 007 an opportunity to turn the tables, and pull Dario down into the grinder for a bloody demise.
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Centrifuge – MOONRAKER – Another tight spot Bond finds himself in is when he is securely strapped to a centrifuge machine. Chang takes the opportunity to send him on a wild ride to his death only to have Bond use his armor-piercing dart from his wrist gun to stop the centrifuge. Bond’s silence upon leaving the machine underlines the danger he just escaped from.
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The Set-Up – TOMORROW NEVER DIES – This time, Bond finds himself held at gunpoint, on the verge of being set up for a murder-suicide. 007 manages to escape thanks to his gadget phone which shocks Kaufman good enough for Bond to get the upper hand and do his job professionally.
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The Fiery Furnace – DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER – This might be the tightest predicament Bond has ever faced–unconscious and trapped in a coffin as it enters a cremation chamber. As the flames begin to rage, one wonders how 007 can get out of this one. This time, he’s rescued by the bad guys who demand to know where he’s placed the real diamonds. In this instance, diamonds are definitely Bond’s best friend.
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Incoming Missiles – GOLDENEYE – Tied up inside a Tigre helicopter with Natalya Simonova, Bond soon finds things are about to get worse when the helicopter suddenly fires two missiles that quickly reverse course and come back at them. Bond uses his head (literally) and manages to hit the eject button that propels them up in the sky and free of the ensuing blast when the missiles strike home.
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Tarantula – DR. NO – In the series’ first deadly trap, Bond finds that a tarantula not only makes a strange, but bad, bedfellow. Awoken late at night by a dangerous spider crawling over his body, 007 manages to keep his cool long enough for the arachnid to climb off him before killing it.
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Countdown – SPECTRE – Bond desperately looks for Madeleine as the clock winds down on demolishing the remains of the MI6 building. 007 finds her, but with only seconds left, he quickly sizes up the situation and lets gravity do the work by holding Madeleine and jumping through a large hole in the center of the building to the ground floor and into the safety of a giant net. The two of them then run to the MI6 dock and jump into a boat and speed out into the Thames just as the building collapses around them.
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Safety Valve – A VIEW TO A KILL – Unconscious in the back seat of his Rolls Royce, Bond is awakened by the rushing of water into the car. As 007 exits the vehicle he notices Max Zorin and May Day watching from above. Does he panic? Of course not. Thinking quickly, he uses the air valve from one of the Rolls’ tires to breathe oxygen and survive until Zorin and May leave. I chose this trap over the burning elevator one later in the film even though the other was a bigger scene because Bond didn’t seem to be trapped that badly getting out of the elevator and out of the building.
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Shark Bait – NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN – Deep-sea diving with Fatima Blush, 007 is quickly abandoned by the SPECTRE henchwoman and left to fend for himself as a number of sharks enter the area, attracted to the homing beacon Fatima has placed on his oxygen tank. An underwater chase involving those deadly sharks soon follows from which Bond narrowly escapes by dropping the beacon down a boat hatch. He then finds a fishing line and becomes the catch of the day for the Nassau fisherwoman he met a couple of hours earlier.
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Parasailing – DIE ANOTHER DAY – This might be my most controversial choice. I put this infamous scene this high, in part, I suppose, because I’m not offended by it as much as most people/fans seem to be. Yes, the scene’s CGI is not as good as it could or should be. But IN CONCEPT, I think it’s a solid scene and highlights Bond’s ability to think quickly on his feet and overcome the obstacles in front of him by using the tools available to him. In this case, a canopy top and a parachute–to escape a calving glacier and its ensuing tsunami. If the CGI was better, this would easily be in the top 10. As it is, it sits at #15 on my list.
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Shark Pool – THUNDERBALL – While fighting a SPECTRE guard in Emilio Largo’s swimming pool, Bond finds finds himself trapped whenLargo covers the pool with a metal sheeting. 007 soon dispatches the guard only to have to elude the incoming sharks from the adjoining shark pool. What follows is a hair-raising trek through the narrow alley between the two pools and dodging an oncoming shark. He manages to escape and tells the last shark that he can tell the others “about the one that got away.”
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Deadly Invitation – THE SPY WHO LOVED ME – This film doesn’t really have a great “trap” situation. The best one is probably Karl Stromberg’s invitation to Bond to sit at the end of his table. Leery, Bond suspects something is up and jumps out of the chair just before it explodes from a deadly bolt fired from Stromberg’s gun under the table. What follows is one of Bond’s coldest kills.
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Outgunned – THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS – This is another film that doesn’t really have a trap situation. My pick occurs once Brad Whitaker turns the tables on Bond and hunts him down inside his villa’s game room. After Bond uses his eight bullets, Whitaker unleashes the first few bursts of his 80. As he closes in on his trapped prey, Bond utilizes his last weapon, a plastic explosive-packed key ring. And boom! Whitaker meets his Waterloo.
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Avalanche – ON HER MAJESTY’S SECRET SERVICE – Chasing Bond and Tracy di Vicenzo on the slopes of Switzerland, Ernst Stavro Blofeld takes the opportunity to set off an avalanche to overtake his nemesis. Bond and Tracy ski for their lives but fail to outrun the snowy juggernaut. Fortunately, they stay ahead of it long enough to only get buried in shallow snow.
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Manhunt – OCTOPUSSY – Bond momentarily escapes from Kamal Khan and his men at the Monsoon Palace, but still finds himself in danger and pursued in a Most Dangerous Game setting on Khan’s grounds. 007 has to use all his wits to escape and only makes it to safety when he waves down a passing tourist boat. This escape would have been higher with a couple of tweaks and a little less comedic moments, but overall it’s still a fun scene.
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Icy Lake – SKYFALL – Again, we have another film that doesn’t really have a trap scene. I went with Bond standing on a frozen lake, staring down the barrel of Raoul Silva’s gun with another of Silva’s henchman behind him. Bond acts quickly and changes the battlefield to the icy depths of the lake. He ultimately wins by strangling/drowning his opponent, but then has to find his way past the frozen surface. I chose this one over Silva’s island situation because Silva didn’t mind being captured by Bond as it was ultimately part of his plan.
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Torture Chair – THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH – Elektra King puts the squeeze on Bond as he sits tied up in a torture chair that is slowly suffocating him. Bond is partially rescued by the arrival of Valentin Zukovsky who shoots the latch off one of the chair’s arm braces, which allows 007 to break free and disarm Elektra.
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Fire Man – QUANTUM OF SOLACE – The closest scene to a trap in this film is the one where Bond finds himself and Camille Montes trapped in a fiery hotel room with no route for escape. As their time runs out, Bond shoots a hydrogen fuel cell, blowing a hole in the wall large enough for the two of them to escape. I know some really like this scene, but it’s never made as much of an impression on me as it does them. It’s good, but not among my favorites.
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Funhouse Duel – THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN – Not so much a trap as a trick, this scene nevertheless comes the closest to being a trap as 007 has to navigate Scaramanga’s funhouse all the while the sharpshooter lurks somewhere in the facility aiming to kill him. Fortunately, Bond gets the better of him and gives a coup de gras.
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Crashing Airplane – YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE – Helga Brandt seemingly traps Bond in an airplane doomed to crash. But as fast as a karate chop, Bond works himself free and manages to land the plane safely enough to evacuate the scene before it explodes. Far from the best trap and escape, but it’s the best one in this film.
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Ball-Busted – CASINO ROYALE – Tied to a chair and finding his balls busted by a ship’s tow rope, Bond is naked and defenseless. Only the perfect timing of Mr. White and Quantum’s desire to recoup 007’s poker winnings, keeps him alive. It’s a great scene, but it’s not a great escape. Just a lucky or fortunate one.
So what are your rankings of James Bond’s close shaves / great escapes?
