Fair point, but I think there’s more mystery about why her father would name a baby “Octopussy”. It’s not right. But, true, not hyphenated, my error. Octopussy Smythe it is. Real name - Olive Smith.
4 Likes
52 seconds in.
2 Likes
Think it was they kept writing Jinx until someone pointed out that Judi Dench talks to her at one point in a war zone.
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That’s cruel and unusual punishment. Oh, another twenty years to forget it. Although in another twenty years I will probably have forgotten everything.
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Please elevate your mind. It is in fact a reference to a…giant…space…laserrrrr!
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September is going to be fun!
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That’s just a big willy.
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1 Like
OK, so the group stage for “The Women” is over, and the outcomes are;
| Group A | Played | Won | Drawn | Lost | For | Against | GD | % | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Vesper | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 62 | 10 | 52 | 86.38 | 12 |
| Tatiana | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 51 | 23 | 28 | 67.68 | 9 |
| Honey | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 40 | 36 | 4 | 52.6 | 6 |
| Madeleine (Spectre) | 4 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 27 | 46 | -19 | 37 | 3 |
| Stacey | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 5 | 69 | -64 | 6.8 | 0 |
Fairly clear winner here. Given a second chance, will Madeleine become more popular? (clue: no). Poor old Stacey, taken by stealth by a huge blimp and seems not to have spotted other opportunities for disaster heading her way. Still, the woman did rip up a cheque for $5 million and does not know what a quiche is, so probably deserves it. Cretin.
| Group B | Played | Won | Drawn | Lost | For | Against | GD | % | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Pussy | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 47 | 24 | 23 | 66.15 | 12 |
| Natalya | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 39 | 31 | 8 | 54.68 | 6 |
| Solitaire | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 38 | 34 | 4 | 54.28 | 6 |
| Pam | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 37 | 34 | 3 | 52.13 | 6 |
| Madeleine (No Time to Die) | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 18 | 54 | -36 | 25 | 0 |
This one was very close, although on general performance Natalya Simonova does get through as runner-up. Solitaire and Pam Bouvier likely to be Lucky Losers into Round 2 on that performance. Pussy Galore has been drawn against Holly Goodhead in the next round, in an encounter right-minded folk are calling “absolute filth”.
Madeleine Swann just got more unpopular. Oh dear.
| Group C | Played | Won | Drawn | Lost | For | Against | GD | % | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Domino | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 59 | 17 | 42 | 77.6 | 12 |
| Anya | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 57 | 19 | 38 | 75 | 9 |
| Camille | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 38 | 37 | 1 | 51.3 | 6 |
| M Skyfall | 4 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 26 | 40 | -14 | 34.23 | 3 |
| Christmas | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 9 | 67 | -58 | 11.88 | 0 |
Possibly the silliest group given the inclusion of M, but I will stop banging on about it. Perhaps Moneypenny would have fared no better.
Talking of banging, hello Domino; and Christmas does indeed come. Last.
| Group D | Played | Won | Drawn | Lost | For | Against | GD | % | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Wai Lin | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 54 | 14 | 40 | 79.4 | 12 |
| Tiffany | 4 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 46 | 22 | 24 | 67.63 | 9 |
| Kissy | 4 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 32 | 36 | -4 | 47.08 | 6 |
| Goodnight | 4 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 20 | 48 | -28 | 29.4 | 3 |
| Jinx | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 18 | 50 | -32 | 26.5 | 0 |
The group with the Die Another Day element in it and, as with all the Deathmatches, the Die Another Day element hands victories on a plate to causes not that much more worthy than it. Fairly sound victory for Wai Lin overall but against stronger comptetion, who knows what will befall her?
| Group E | Played | Won | Drawn | Lost | For | Against | GD | % | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Tracy | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 62 | 10 | 52 | 86.1 | 12 |
| Holly | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 37 | 35 | 2 | 51.38 | 7 |
| Melina | 4 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 31 | 39 | -8 | 44.63 | 7 |
| Octopussy | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 25 | 46 | -21 | 35.3 | 1 |
| Kara | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 23 | 48 | -25 | 32.6 | 1 |
Close fight for second place, but it would always have been a close fight for second place. Tracy emerges with the same goal difference as Vesper and those two might be hard to prise apart. However much fun it might be to try.
| Form table | Round 1 Group Stage |
|---|---|
| Vesper Lynd | 86.38 |
| Tracy diVicenzo | 86.1 |
| Wai Lin | 79.4 |
| Domino Derval | 77.6 |
| Anya Amasova | 75 |
| Tatiana Romanova | 67.68 |
| Tiffany Case | 67.63 |
| Pussy Galore | 66.15 |
| Natalya Simonova | 54.68 |
| Solitaire | 54.28 |
| Honey Ryder | 52.6 |
| Pam Bouvier | 52.13 |
| Holly Goodhead | 51.38 |
| Camille Montes | 51.3 |
| Kissy Suzuki | 47.08 |
| Melina Havelock | 44.63 |
| Madeleine Swann (Spectre) | 37 |
| Octopussy | 35.3 |
| M Skyfall | 34.23 |
| Kara Milovy | 32.6 |
| Mary Goodnight | 29.4 |
| Jinx | 26.5 |
| Madeleine Swann (No Time to Die) | 25 |
| Christmas Jones | 11.88 |
| Stacey Sutton | 6.8 |
Lucky Losers going through to the Second Round are
Solitaire
Honey Ryder
Pam Bouvier
Camille Montes
Kissy Suzuki
Melina Havelock
But how long can such luck last?
4 Likes
With Round 2 of “The Women” done, form table as below. Quarter-Final voting now open to September 6.
| Form table | Round 2 (% change) (position change) |
|---|---|
| Vesper Lynd | 88.1 (+1.72) (-) |
| Tracy diVicenzo | 85.54 (-0.56) (-) |
| Anya Amasova | 76.66 (+1.66) (+2) |
| Domino Derval | 75.76 (-1.84) (-) |
| Wai Lin | 74.04 (-5.36) (-2) |
| Tatiana Romanova | 70.99 (+3.31) (-) |
| Pussy Galore | 64.02 (-2.13) (+1) |
| Tiffany Case | 60.44 (-7.19) (-1) |
| Natalya Simonova | 59.74 (+5.06) (-) |
| Honey Ryder | 51.56 (-1.04) (+1) |
| Holly Goodhead | 50 (-1.38) (+2) |
| Camille Montes | 48.82 (-2.48) ((+2) |
| Pam Bouvier | 45.04 (-7.09) (-1) |
| Solitaire | 44.42 (-9.86) (-4) |
| Kissy Suzuki | 40.82 (-6.26) (-) |
| Melina Havelock | 39.04 (-5.59) (-) |
| Madeleine Swann (Spectre) | 37 |
| Octopussy | 35.3 |
| M Skyfall | 34.23 |
| Kara Milovy | 32.6 |
| Mary Goodnight | 29.4 |
| Jinx | 26.5 |
| Madeleine Swann (No Time to Die) | 25 |
| Christmas Jones | 11.88 |
| Stacey Sutton | 6.8 |
Reasonably stable at the top although a fair amount of jigglin’ about, but a big drop for Solitaire.She should have seen that coming. Unless Bond’s been having another pop at her.
4 Likes
With the Quarter-Finals done…
| Form table | Quarter-Finals (% change) (position change) |
|---|---|
| Vesper Lynd | 84.7 (-3.4) (-) |
| Tracy diVicenzo | 84.25 (-1.29) (-) |
| Anya Amasova | 76.63 (-0.03) (-) |
| Domino Derval | 68.68 (-7.08) (-) |
| Wai Lin | 66.33 (-7.71) (-) |
| Pussy Galore | 65.38 (+1.36) (+1) |
| Tatiana Romanova | 62.86 (-8.13) (-1) |
| Tiffany Case | 60.44 |
| Natalya Simonova | 53.7 (-6.04) (-) |
| Honey Ryder | 51.6 |
| Holly Goodhead | 50 |
| Camille Montes | 48.42 |
| Pam Bouvier | 45.04 |
| Solitaire | 44.42 |
| Kissy Suzuki | 40.82 |
| Melina Havelock | 30.04 |
| Madeleine Swann (Spectre) | 37 |
| Octopussy | 35.3 |
| M Skyfall | 34.23 |
| Kara Milovy | 32.6 |
| Mary Goodnight | 29.4 |
| Jinx | 26.5 |
| Madeleine Swann (No Time to Die) | 25 |
| Christmas Jones | 11.88 |
| Stacey Sutton | 6.8 |
Not a huge amount of movement despite some big drops. However, with the top two playing each other in the Semi-Final, still some opportunity for league form to move around between the top three…
Albeit crashing out at the Quarter-Final stage, Natalya puts in the best performance for GoldenEye amongst the Deathmatches so far this year. Possibly the best performance in GoldenEye, come to think of it.
4 Likes
Form table as “The Women” moves into the final stages.
| Form table | Semi-Finals (% change) (position change) |
|---|---|
| Vesper Lynd | 80.87 (-3.83) (-) |
| Tracy diVicenzo | 78.23 (-6.02) (-) |
| Anya Amasova | 76.63 (-4.18) (-) |
| Domino Derval | 68.68 |
| Wai Lin | 66.33 |
| Pussy Galore | 63.55 (-1.83) (-) |
| Tatiana Romanova | 62.86 |
| Tiffany Case | 60.44 |
| Natalya Simonova | 53.7 |
| Honey Ryder | 51.6 |
| Holly Goodhead | 50 |
| Camille Montes | 48.42 |
| Pam Bouvier | 45.04 |
| Solitaire | 44.42 |
| Kissy Suzuki | 40.82 |
| Melina Havelock | 30.04 |
| Madeleine Swann (Spectre) | 37 |
| Octopussy | 35.3 |
| M Skyfall | 34.23 |
| Kara Milovy | 32.6 |
| Mary Goodnight | 29.4 |
| Jinx | 26.5 |
| Madeleine Swann (No Time to Die) | 25 |
| Christmas Jones | 11.88 |
| Stacey Sutton | 6.8 |
Depending on outcome of the Third place death-off and the Final, could still be some shifting around the Top Ten, and first place isn’t necessarily a given…
2 Likes
Tomorrow, outcomes of “The Women” round and also the start of Deathmatch: Henchbod.
Groups for that (following the draw common to all Deathmatches):
Group A
Professor Dent
Kronsteen
May Day
Dimitrios
Hinx
Decisions had to be taken here - as Klebb & Grant were a duo earlier for main villain, needed someone else for From Russia with Love. Flip of the coin between Kronsteen and Morzeny, it’s Kronsteen. It’s his plan. For Dr No, Professor Dent probably the most impactful. Hard to say for Casino Royale - Mr White? - but went with Dimitrios as he has quite a lot to do in the early part of the film, and Bond shags his missus and takes his car off him. Then kills him.
Group B
Oddjob
Tee Hee
Dario
Xenia
Primo
Again, decisions - I think Primo/Cyclops is meant to be the main hench in No Time to Die. Unless it’s M. Could be Logan Ash but he’s a bit forgettable. As far as Dario is concerned, Sanchez seems to have a lot of goons and Krest I suppose is a contender but Dario has a lovely smile and cracking tits.
Group C
Fiona Volpe
Jaws (The Spy who Loved Me)
Renard
Elvis
Patrice
Renard is a henchman and that’s the law, that is. Patrice doesn’t do much but is instrumental in the early part of the film and I can’t think of anyone else. I fear a bit of a bloodbath here.
Group D
Helga Brandt
Wint & Kidd
Nick Nack
Stamper
Zao
OK, so it could have been Miranda Frost but for reasoning, see Dario, above.
Group E
Irma Bunt
Jaws (Moonraker)
Locque
Gobinda
Necros
Could have been Chang/Charrrrrrrrrrrrrr.for Moonraker; but it isn’t.
3 Likes
Deathmatch: The Women has concluded
1st: Vesper Lynd
2nd: Pussy Galore
3rd: Tracy diVicenzo
4th: Anya Amasova
Some further analysis to follow but notably a Goldfinger element achieves Semi-Final or better for the fifth time this year.
| Form table | Final (position change) | Seed 2023 |
|---|---|---|
| Vesper Lynd | 80.14 (-) | 1 |
| Tracy diVicenzo | 77.28 (-) | 2 |
| Domino Derval | 68.68 (+1) | 3 |
| Anya Amasova | 67.07 (-1) | 4 |
| Wai Lin | 66.33 | 5 |
| Tatiana Romanova | 62.86 (+1) | 6 |
| Tiffany Case | 60.44 (+1) | 7 |
| Pussy Galore | 58.73 (-2) | 8 |
| Natalya Simonova | 53.7 | 9 |
| Honey Ryder | 51.6 | 10 |
| Holly Goodhead | 50 | |
| Camille Montes | 48.42 | |
| Pam Bouvier | 45.04 | |
| Solitaire | 44.42 | |
| Kissy Suzuki | 40.82 | |
| Melina Havelock | 30.04 | |
| Madeleine Swann (Spectre) | 37 | |
| Octopussy | 35.3 | |
| M Skyfall | 34.23 | |
| Kara Milovy | 32.6 | |
| Mary Goodnight | 29.4 | |
| Jinx | 26.5 | |
| Madeleine Swann (No Time to Die) | 25 | |
| Christmas Jones | 11.88 | |
| Stacey Sutton | 6.8 |
Seeding straightforward because this is the first time this has run. Final and Third place death-off had some impacts on that. Acknowledged that Domino achieves 3rd seed having played fewer matches than many but - you slip on your big old coping hat and smile through the tears, yeah?
More soon.
4 Likes
Deathmatch outcomes 2022 so far - by film
| Villain | Film | Song | Bond | Woman | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Winner | Moonraker | The Spy who Loved Me | Live and Let Die | From Russia with Love | Casino Royale |
| Runner-up | Goldfinger | Goldfinger | The Spy who Loved Me | Goldfinger | Goldfinger |
| Third | From Russia with Love | OHMSS | OHMSS | Casino Royale | OHMSS |
| Fourth | Thunderball | Skyfall | Goldfinger | Skyfall | The Spy who Loved Me |
Of 20 places here, Goldfinger occupies a quarter without ever winning. Admired for quality overall whilst not quite having a standout to win? Might that change with the Henchpeople vote?
Still heavily weighted to the 60s and 70s. Hmm.
3 Likes
I know some may see it differently, but I’ve always seen the following as their films’ henchmen: No’s 3 “Blind” Assassins in Dr. No, Donald “Red” Grant in From Russia With Love (with Rosa Klebb as the villain), Hans in You Only Live Twice, Grunther in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, Chang in Moonraker, and Kratt in Casino Royale (he’s not a great henchman but he’s more of a personal henchman than Dimitrios who’s role is more of a manpower supplier). The rest I agree with you, Jim.
Regardless, it should be an interesting and fun tournament. May the best (worst?) henchman win. 
2 Likes
Top Ten of Everything so far - by form (% chance of success in a match)
| Villain | Film | Song | Bond | Woman | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Moonraker | From Russia with Love | Live and Let Die | From Russia with Love | Casino Royale |
| 2 | From Russia with Love | Casino Royale | Casino Royale | Goldfinger | OHMSS |
| 3 | Goldfinger | The Spy who Loved Me | A View to a Kill | Casino Royale | Thunderball |
| 4 | The Man with the Golden Gun | OHMSS | Diamonds are Forever | The Spy who Loved Me | The Spy who Loved Me |
| 5 | OHMSS | You Only Live Twice | Skyfall | The Living Daylights | Tomorrow Never Dies |
| 6 | Skyfall | Skyfall | You Only Live Twice | Skyfall | From Russia with Love |
| 7 | Thunderball | Goldfinger | The Spy who Loved Me | Tomorrow Never Dies | Diamonds are Forever |
| 8 | Licence to Kill | Tomorrow Never Dies | OHMSS | No Time to Die | Goldfinger |
| 9 | You Only Live Twice | No Time to Die | Goldfinger | For Your Eyes Only | GoldenEye |
| 10 | A View to a Kill | Moonraker | From Russia with Love | Diamonds are Forever | Dr No |
Visits to the Top Tens, accordingly
| 5 Top Tens | 4 Top Tens | 3 Top Tens | 2 Top Tens | 1 Top Ten | Bog all so far |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| From Russia with Love | OHMSS | You Only Live Twice | Thunderball | Dr No | Octopussy |
| Goldfinger | The Spy who Loved Me | Diamonds are Forever | Moonraker | Live and Let Die | TWINE |
| Casino Royale | Tomorrow Never Dies | A View to a Kill | The Man with the Golden Gun | Die Another Day | |
| Skyfall | No Time to Die | For Your Eyes Only | Quantum of Solace | ||
| The Living Daylights | Spectre | ||||
| Licence to Kill | |||||
| GoldenEye |
Dr No and GoldenEye break in following the Deathmatches for The Women. For the others yet to score here, any hope given that the remaining categories are Henchpeople, Whole score (except title song) and one other I haven’t thought up yet. Form tends to suggest that Die Another Day couldn’t score in a contest called “Is your name Die Another Day?”.
Sort-of surprise candidate - Diamonds are Forever? Possible underperformers - the brace of Daltons? Still, there’s quite a lot of Death to Match yet to come…
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Might I suggest doing one for allies such as Kerim Bey, Marc-Ange Draco, Vijay, Saunders, Jack Wade, Kincaid, and such?
1 Like
Good call, will probably go that way. That or “Victims”, which might cover a lot of the same people anyway.
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Sacrificial Lambs?
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