What Could the Next Line Have Been?


#1

Remember this one? Any time you ever muttered something else under your breath when a character was speaking, here’s the place to give it voice.
Fr’instance:

Bond: Well, what’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this? I have a confession to make.
Helga: What?
Bond: Actually, I’m a spy.
Helga: You? Ha!

Knock yerselves out.


#2

M: “It seems the good doctor has cleared you, notes you have exceptional stamina.”
Moneypenny: “I’m sure she was touched by his dedication…Did you check him for venereal disease?”


#3

“You left this with Ferrara, I believe.” (Kick, scream, crash)

“…And that’s for making me run up all those damned steps!”


#4

(Spit take)
Just the kind of response I was hoping for, Dave. Keep 'em coming.


#5

(Just a thought for the mods…should this thread be moved to the Games section?)

Anyways, thanks for reviving this, AMC!

I’ll have a go…

Bond: " M doesn’t really mind you earning a little money on the side, Dreyden…She’d just prefer it if it wasn’t selling secrets!"

Dreyden: " Ok, how about I sell balloons? I know this fellow who will hook me up with a job at the Prater amusement park in Vienna…"


#6

“Ah Mr. Bond, your reputation proceeds you of course!”

“…i am so fired”


#7

Bond: “It might be useful to know your real name.”
“Fields.”
“Just Fields?”
“Strawberry Fields.”
“In that case, let me take you down…”
“I’m not listening.”
“Sure, living is easy with eyes closed…”
“I’ve heard it all before - it’s no use.”
“Are you saying ‘nothing is real’? Well, that’s nothing to get hung about…”
“You’re such an a**hole.”


#8

M: “You’ll be glad to know, I straightened things out with the Americans. Your friend Leiter’s been promoted. He replaced Beam.”
Bond: “Well, then the right people kept their jobs.”
M: “Something like that. Beam is running for president.”
Bond: “Oh hell…”


#9

Bond: " A gun in a bag of peanuts…how original! What will they think of next?"

Nick Nack: " How about a grenade in a box of popcorn? "


#10

And that’s what they did in the Barry Levinson movie “Diner” with Mickey Rourke (1982).

Here’s the full scene

M: “And he’s a Democrat.”
Bond: “Bloody hell!”
M: “And J.W. Pepper is his running mate. He and his wife Maybelle are lifelong Democrats.”

Guys like Beam are always Democrats…


#11

True - the current US president was a Democrat, until he decided to run.


#12

"Red wine with fish – that should have told me something…

… Come to think of it, that box of Ho-Hos for dessert was rather gauche, as well."


#13

“Can you see the headlines? British agent murders beautiful Russian spy, then kills himself?..The first one won’t kill you. Not the second. Not even the third. Not til you crawl over here and kiss my foot.”

“Hold on, how is it going to look like suicide if I have multiple gunshot wounds?”

“What?”

“I mean, poor aim is one thing, but four rounds to kill myself? Isn’t that kind of stretching it?”

“Shut up!”

“Maybe it’d sound more convincing to just claim I ran myself over with a car?”

“I said Shut Up!”

"You’re kind of new at this, aren’t you? "


#14

Bond opens Drax’s safe with his X-ray cigarette case.
Corinne: “That’s amazing!”
Bond (holding case up to her chest): “There you are, you see - you have a heart of gold.”
Corinne: “You think I’m a what?!


#15

Jinx: “Ornithologist, huh? Wow…(glances down) now there’s a mouthful.”
Bond: “That was a really terrible line.”
Jinx: “You think I don’t know that? I didn’t write it. I just won an Oscar, but it wasn’t for performing this script.”
Bond: “If you can maintain your sincerity reciting this dreck, you deserve another one.”


#16

Bond would never make the connection or know the lyrics to that song. Canonically, Bond will not listen to the Beatles without wearing earmuffs.


#17

On a similar note of awful attempt at double entendre…

“Sorry Felix, I can’t, something bigs come up”
“James…I’ve told you before, we’re as close as two friendly colleagues can be, but that doesn’t stretch to you describing your junk in what you think is a double entendre, I dont need that mental image”


#18

“That’s like listening to the Beatles without earmuffs.”
“Earmuffs? You mean those things that keep your ears warm in the winter?”
“What? No. This is Florida!”
“But James, you said…”
“No, no, earmuffs! Those things that go over your ears and there’s a cable connecting them to your stereo.”
“Earphones.”
“Right, sorry, earphones. Without earphones you miss the best parts of the song. Never listen to the Beatles without them.”


#19

Bond: “I was wrong about you.”

Christmas: “Yea, how so?”

Bond: “I thought Christmas only comes once a year.”

throws drink in his face

Christmas: “Pervert!”

Bond: “…worth it.”


#20

“What did i say about Christmas jokes?!! It was the first thing i said to you!!”