Deathmatch 2026: Sideswipes

Special Interest
81

I have removed these given the incident with Young Mr Bryce and “That’s not his finger”. However gratifying the screaming.

5 Likes
82

A new face would be handy after yesterday’s exploding spectacles. As long as it’s not the Amazon Basics edition (would prefer not to resemble Bezos). Also, given the kind of tat on Amazon these days, I’m sure there’s a Connery YOLT joke in here somewhere if I wasn’t far too progressive a person to make it.

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83

Brown clothes. Whatever is out of style, will come back, But, like SC himself, I just need to make sure I fit in to them when the time is right.

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84

Scalpels and cats… somehow I like it! I am probably just relieved that there was not something what would be realy expensive, like something with diamonds.. a diamond necklace, or a space laser shield made of diamonds… Pffff!

3 Likes
85

If executives at Amazon were smart, among the offerings would be a pink tie, an oversized Bible, and a plastic scorpion.

3 Likes
86

That pink tie (of a certain length) should be in the 007.com store.

I would certainly order it.

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87

I would also ensure its of a certain width too……..

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88

That pink tie should have gotten a credit during the title sequence.

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89

I’ll take the fez cause the 11th Doctor says they’re cool.

But what I really want is ventriloquist lessons from the Japanese guy, who can say “Cairo” without moving his mouth.

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90

My reason:

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91

June 9.

You still can’t buy anything in the title sequence nor beyond so, basically, no gold for…

Goldfinger

Instead, to keep the film going, you’re stuck with:

  • Heroin flavoured banana. Yum! One of your five a day.
  • A duck headpiece. Be THE talking point at parties. And subsequently at the police station.
  • One carnation. It’ll be very dead by the time it gets to you. It’s the thought that counts, though.
  • A very cheap waterproof electric fire. Not yet actually tested for being waterproof, hence price. Have fun finding out!
  • Banana flavoured heroin. Yum! One of your nine a day.
0 voters
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92

The duck headpiece. Makes my baldness look animalistic. And I can retire my Connery-Wrong is right-rug.

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93

The dead carnation it is for me. These days when I have to wear a suit to report with my masters and keepers, wearing a dead carnation is the fitting ornament to tone and theme of the discourse.

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94

Definitely the duck headpiece. I’ve always wanted one, good to see that we’ll finally get to buy these… :laughing:

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95

Going with the duck headgear. Not only can I repeatedly recreate the “why a duck” routine with friends and coworkers, but I can finally fit in at Thanksgiving with my in-laws who also have their heads up Donald’s bum.

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96

For the sake of variety, I’m going with the cheap waterproof electric fire. If nothing else, it holds the possibility of some “thrills and excitement” at some moment down the line. Like a cheap electric scooter (also available via our new overlords) - whizzing about with the wind in your hair before your garage goes up in flames.

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97

June 10.

Whether you’d really want to watch the rest of it (surely you have some vicious minor surgery to perform on yourself?), you can’t subject yourself to Lulu’s screeching nor the nuances of Sheriff Pepper’s return without buying something that features in the pre-credits sequence of

The Man with the Golden Gun

  • A bottle of Tabasco. There, that was easy. You’ll now be bombarded with emails trying to sell you more, even though you already have it.
  • A curiously placed crow.
  • Comedy triple nipple! Seconds of endless amusement, until you find that the glue is permanent.
  • Butler’s outfit. Possibly a bit tight.
  • Some warm, old oysters. Cheaper than a regime of weight-loss drugs.
  • A golden gnu. You think it’s a typo. It isn’t.
0 voters
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98

The Tabasco. Since I’ve found out it’s a really useful ingredient in everything from custard to coffee and adds a personal note to the toiletries in the guest bathroom, it’s become my favourite condiment and domestic remedy.

3 Likes
99

To dustin@lovely.de - Hi Mr Dustin! You bought Tabasco! People who bought Tabasco also bought Tabasco! Buy Tabasco! These emails will continue until Earthdeath however often you try to cancel them!

4 Likes
100

The butler´s outfit.

Since the neighbor´s cat decided to live with us my wife and I are humble servants for her anyway, and we love it.

So, two uniforms, please. And I can watch TMWTGG any day. I am that weird, yes.

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